The Meaning of Life

April 17, 2015 Uncategorized 8 Comments

Ahgrrrrrghhh, “one last push!” Ahrggrrrr and my son was born; me in my partners arms (literally holding me up) and our little baby in mine. “What is it?” I asked, exhausted after 26 hours of labour, but the midwives refused to tell me, “find out for yourself” they said (as I had requested in my birth plan), so I did and was very pleased to be blessed with the most beautiful baby boy I had ever seen! He attached to my breast immediately in the lovely calm of our dimly lit flat at 4.28am on the morning of 13th October 2013. 4.28am!!! Our poor neighbours. I had probably kept them up all night. From that moment on, my life would never be the same again. I had finally discovered the true meaning of life; it’s a secret, a knowing that every parent shares and no matter how different you are as people, once you are a parent, you automatically have a connection with other parents. I now have the utmost respect for all parents, knowing that no matter how they choose to parent, it’s a bloody difficult task and the biggest but most rewarding challenge of my life.

I think this was day 1

I think this was day 1

Once I emerged from the 4 months of ‘establishing breastfeeding’ I was finally able to start to think and socialise, become almost normal; although to be honest, the first year of my son’s life is a bit of a blur due to the severe sleep deprivation. This really came to light, just before my son’s 1st birthday, when one morning I put our electric kettle on the gas hob, after my usual 6 hours of broken sleep and a 5am start. Anyway, I digress, what I’m trying to say is I can’t remember the exact order of things, but basically, like many new mums I didn’t want to return to my full-time, 9-5 job, as much as I enjoyed it, and decide that I was going to take my life long love and turn it into a career by becoming a professional photographer. I didn’t know how or when, all I knew was that this is what I wanted to do.

The Kettle!

The Kettle!

At first I thought about becoming a wedding photographer as this would involve everything I enjoy about photography; capturing emotion, portraits of people, nice buildings and landscapes; however, when I published my Facebook page I realised that the pictures I enjoyed the most were those of children, hence I decided to specialise in the field of ‘family photography’ but to include ‘weddings’ as part of my work. With no money and a credit card I bought my first camera and lens, knowing that it was an investment in our future. I now have a well supplied camera bag, processing software, insurance and a fully fledged business.

It all felt very daunting in the begining; however, with the backing, support and encouragement of my family and friends (for which I am eternally grateful) I have been propelled forward and for the first time in my life I am really excited to have a career. The irony of it is, that my career has come about by wanting to be with my son and I must of course thank him for choosing me as his mummy and showing me the true meaning of life.

Home-made Easter bick bicks (in case you couldn’t tell!)

Home-made Easter bick bicks (in case you couldn’t tell!)

If you have enjoyed reading my blog, please come by again soon and feel free to share your comments. I hope to be sharing more stories about our adventures, my experience of motherhood and recommendations of great places to go with the family. I’ll also be carrying out my own photo projects and blogging about them too; next up is an introduction to my ‘dad’ campaign!

Finally, if you’d like to see some of my work in print, I have an exhibition on at St Ann’s Well Garden Cafe, Hove.